If you have been through a traumatic event like a bad accident, a natural disaster, a violent attack, or combat, sometime after the event you are probably experiencing post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD.  After trying to manage it yourself, you have now come to realize that you need professional help.  the good news is that SoulCare Counseling uses a model of therapy that is especially effective with PTSD.

Have you ever bought an item of clothing that was “one-size-fits-all?” That’s quite a claim that the same pair of pants could fit both Pee Wee Herman and Andre the Giant. I’m sure those men bought different kinds of pants. In the same way, trauma is not one-size-fits-all. There are different kinds of trauma. This blog explores two different kinds of trauma, major trauma and developmental trauma.”

As therapists who work with Emotionally Focused Therapy, we see both the pain and power of intimacy. Ironically, love can hurt us but love can also heal us. The bitter and the sweet are in the same fountain. An intimate relationship, when it loses safety and security, can be a torture chamber inflicting pain. But when safety and security are in place, it can be a healing chamber healing pain. That is the goal of EFT.

When dissociation happens infrequently, during monotonous tasks like driving, listening to a lecture, or reading, that is normal. However, if it goes beyond that, there is cause for concern.

So, trauma is not an event; but it is the brain’s response to what it perceives as a threat to or loss of safety. Because of that, trauma is not a societal standard of what is suffering and what is not. It is personal and unique to the individual. Thus, there is no reason to be too embarrassed to talk about our trauma.

When your partner has a history of trauma, a simple thing like coming up from behind and kissing her neck can trigger a ghost from the past that sparks a conflict in the present. That past trauma is suddenly in the room, very real and very powerful.

There is an old preacher joke that is all too true. A pastor says to his doctor, “I think I may be paranoid; I feel like someone’s out to get me.” The doctor says, “You’re not paranoid, pastor; I know some of your church members and they are out to get you.”

Except for cases where trauma is caused by a natural disaster, all trauma happens in relationships. Trauma is a relationship wound, and your attachment style highly affects your ability to recover from it.

One of the most common treatments for trauma is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. CBT is about changing behavior through changing cognition (thinking). The CBT therapist uses a method that questions the client’s flawed thoughts and emotions, seeking to help the client correct his/her cognition, which in turn will correct his/her behavior.

“Of all the things trauma takes away from us, the worst is our willingness, or even our ability, to be vulnerable.” That is a huge loss because without the ability to be vulnerable, it is impossible to live a happy, healthy life because we can’t connect in a healthy way with others.

No one is exempt from emotional scars. If you went through a traumatic experience in your childhood, those scars can be particularly painful as an adult